This article has my name listed as the author, but really, the smart and savvy @CtKscribe is responsible for all this fabulousness. In her own words, she is known as the Queen of Ball Busting on Twitter, but I like to think of her as a delicate flower, a Twitter princess. ;)
On the eve of Twitter’s 4th Birthday, as we were all reminiscing about what Twitter means to us, @CtKscribe had one of her great ideas. We got together and asked some of our friends to momentarily consider a website’s worst moment, its demise.
Can you imagine life with no Twitter? Wouldn’t it be strange? After all, what would we spend all day doing? I can’t even remember my life before Twitter.
What will happen on that dark internet day when Twitter ceases to exist, leaving a gaping hole in cyberspace? Luckily it hasn’t happened, but we wanted to know amidst the terrific birthday cheer, “If Twitter died today, what would be its 140 character Obituary?”
Each of the tweeters below mourned in their own way.
How would you write Twitter’s obituary?
@mayhemstudios from Los Angeles, California
“Hello? Anyone there? lol”
“Twitter found dead, overdose of RT’s & DM Spam. Memorial will b held today @ 1:40PM. In other news, Facebook Traffic Breaks records!”
“Here lies Twitter, a blue bird that never could relate with whales. Going out to sea was not a bright idea.”
@karenquah from Here, there and everywhere“Twitter was a great listener. Not out of choice. But because everyone else would not shut up. Thus she died in silence. With lots of noise.”
“We’re sad to see Twitter go, but it opens a new door for our replacement: “BigFuck” a new and exciting site you can join now for only $29.50.”
“Welcome Tweeps. 2day we mourn over our beloved Twitter. Twitterholics all around R reeling. It’s survived by Facebook & sadly, MySpace. :(“
“Even death can’t be unfollowed. But Twitter, why did you have to unfollow life itself? You will always be remembered in search!”
“It’s not twitter I mourn, but my friends. My beautiful passing friends whose emails I put off asking for, and blogs I neglected to bookmark.”
“Adieu Twitter—Int’l friend connector 2 millions, info king 2 most, twitterholic enabler 2 many, misjudged by some. Lil blue will be missed.”
“Twitter will be remembered for many things, one of which will be the way you allowed me to engage with thousands of people around the world.”
“O, @twitter… how i loved U. ur wisdom, ur humour, ur block feature. 1 thing b4 u go… does speakng twttr count as bi-lingual on a resume?”
“RIP Twitter – You enabled me to show thousands of people what a complete wanker I am, in little bitesize chunks of idiocy. Miss you.”
“After one too many fail whales, twitter has died. It is remembered by the millions of experts, gurus, and ninjas who are now homeless.”
“Lived fast. Died young but on top. Millions attended funeral in hopes of selling an eBook to other attendees. A few wept, others Buzzed.”
“Insanities, inanities &useful flame wars aided my procrastination for years. Plus, now I know everything via a ‘Top 10: How To’ format #Ciao”
“Twttr is gone it has 2 B said, It happened so quick, still shakin my head so w/ that in mind, try not whine & jump ovr 2 try f/book instead.”
“Suddenly, or perhaps not so suddenly, last night while millions watched Lost, Twitter died. Now no one will know what you had for breakfast.”
“Farewell, parting is such tweet sorrow. Twitter reminded us sometimes less is more, but it can also be just plain moronic. WTF lol #RIP”
“A great friend, leading to many more great friends, plentiful laughs, much info & prof’l growth. You will be missed, but quickly replaced.”
“You introduced me to a new world of @, #, via, RT and XOXO. But I’ll always be grateful to you for introducing me to wonderful new friends.”
“Twitter died, leaving millions of bereaved loved ones to mourn its loss. Social medial will never be the same. Services to be live streamed.”
“Good-bye Twitter. I wonder what Justin Bieber will do?”
“Twitter helped bring us closer 2 any version of a Utopia I may have had by breaking down social barriers & giving airtime 2 the average Joe.”
“Twitter has brought so much happiness to my life and has helped me tremendously and I want to express my feelings for it but i need more…”
@rMiL5 from Indonesia“It was a tweet, retweet and fail whale… will tweet from hell.”
“Twitter is down really!? Oh wait I could buy it! Oh damn! okay can we build a twitter 2.0? It used to be personal newspaper! Oh Dear!”
“My greatest concern is that my work here will be remembered most for its easily-correfted spelling errors.”
“Twitter was a playground as much as a boardroom. Creativity & friendship thrived. #TT RIP #Twitter You will be missed!”
“Twitter – The meeting of great people, the sharing of knowledge, the smiling with the whole world, The LOLs created, we will not forget you!”
“Twitter is dead and it’s my fault. I sodomized her to death.”
“Twitter, a social media firestorm, died because it took the “social” out of “social media,” putting profits before people.”
“WHEN TWITTER DIED, MY HEART STOPPED BEATING ON ITS 140TH BEAT!”
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